As promised here are the Individual Player Reports for several players in the league. We carefully curated this particular list to highlight a wide variety of player skill, or lack thereof. Also included is our Season 17 Team of Excellence!
Talon: Millsy is basically the best. Everyone should subscribe to his youtube and take friggin notes on how to play the game. Again he'll be crucial for the Kings to this season, but he'll have to settle for 2nd place in league leaderboards.
rV_Snubbed: Clutchz is actually the best player in the world. Lucky he'll only have to carry one forward this season now that he was able to escape shot. The pair of his left thumb, and his right thumb is far better than any 3 players on another other team (except Laziee on Carolina obviously).
VishGawd: Dubbed as such, Vish will again be his teams go to offensive rifiler. Vish possess a highly skilled arsenal of tools that he is able to dawn in a variety of situations. A dynamic skating ability allows him to create space while entering the zone with ease.
That guy: Don't waste your time trying to play vs this chel stud. You be better off saving the +/- by forfeiting. He'll score a minimum of 3 goals a game now that he's on a team that won't shatter his back, shoulders, heart, and his hopes and dreams.
AAAAAAAAA_Enjoy_on_your_Knees: All of him is great! Like a scuffed Skillzpaybills but probably cutier. Aali and Knees are reunited with an outstanding winger… I'd like to relay a message to all other teams from the Devils…. "YOU'RE TRASH, EASY CASH"... Again, don't waste your time by getting farmed for stats. Just forfeit vs New Jersey.
The Shaft-istician: The 2x is the complete puck moving defender. Not as known for his shot, but can setup and execute a variety of offensive plays. Complemented by his defensive zone shut down ability. Expect Stat to buy his 3rd Norris in as many seasons to keep the shaft streak alive.
Spirit Animal: Majestic glue eating boar
Thumb Excellence Value: 80.154
After they score all the goals and notice hatty and dangles were on the ice the whole time
az dek: Sleeper pick up for the rangers. This french defender should pair nicely with the Qc owner. Top quality play and equally impressive dog pictures from azdek, what else is needed.
Spirit Animal: Rare Sophisticated French Dog
Thumb Excellence Value: 45.594
So there were a few of the Player Reports given to our team after the conclusion of our computer simulations... But we have 1 more treat before our final conclusion and the final standings for this upcoming season. It's my pleasure to present the YSoHGaTET Team of Excellence for Season 17.